I was visiting friends last weekend when their two-year-old proudly pulled out his bike to show off his skills. It was a familiar European model: low to the ground, no pedals—it's called a balance bike.
The idea? Kids learn to balance before they learn to pedal. No clunky training wheels. No pedals even. No awkward in-between. Just a natural, playful progression.
Not for nothing, their little guy zipped around the yard like a pro.
It’s the perfect analogy for how we build confidence in anything...
The myth of waiting for clarity
Ever stared at a big decision and thought, I’m just not confident about the next step?
We tell ourselves that once we’re sure, we’ll act—that confidence comes from certainty, that thinking harder will reveal the right answer.
🚨 But what if we’ve got it backwards?
Confidence and clarity don’t precede action. Action creates clarity.
Big decisions rarely come with a roadmap. Waiting until you “just know” can keep you stuck indefinitely.
It’s like learning to ride a bike. You don’t study balance until you’re sure you won’t fall. You get on, wobble, adjust—and learn balance by doing.
Decisions work the same way.
❌ You don’t need clarity to act.
✅ You need action to get clarity.
Why experiments build confidence and clarity
An experiment is a lightweight way to try before you buy—to gather real-world data without the pressure of permanence.
Rather than agonizing over a choice, experiment with it.
Here’s how:
1️⃣ Shrink the stakes.
Consider what you can do in a day, a week, or a month to learn more.
Instead of “Should I switch careers?” → Try “What if I took one project in that field?” 🛠️💼
Instead of “Should I move abroad?” → Try “What if I spent a month in that city?” ✈️🌍
2️⃣ Get real feedback, not theoretical guesses.
Most of what we fear is hypothetical (you may recall we touched on the absurd tradition of humans pretending they know what happens next 🤣). But once we take action, we get real-world evidence.
Instead of “Will I like this job?” → Shadow someone for a day. 🕵️♂️👩💻
Instead of “Will I enjoy solo travel?” → Take a weekend trip alone. 🎒🏕️
3️⃣ Use action to unlock the next step.
You don’t have to map the whole path—just the next move. Every small experiment teaches you something, giving you more confidence for the next one.
🔥 This week: start small, experiment often 🔬
Last week, we explored finding a "Third Way" when faced with seemingly contradictory choices. Now, let’s turn those options into real experiments!
This week, try a tiny, low-stakes experiment to gather real evidence instead of just guessing what works:
🍽️ Cook vs. takeout? Want both convenience AND nutrition?
Experiment: Order your main dish but make a quick homemade side.
Notice: Does this hybrid approach satisfy both needs better than choosing just one?
🍳 Sweet vs. savory breakfast? Craving both indulgence AND substance?
Experiment: Make a mini breakfast board (boiled egg, berries, nut butter toast).
Notice: Does variety solve the either/or breakfast problem?
👫 Social vs. solo recharge? Need both connection AND downtime?
Experiment: Try “social osmosis”—spend time in a café or public space without interacting.
Notice: Does being around others (without direct engagement) give you both energy sources?
The 🗝️? It’s about information, not answers.
Experiments help you get curious instead of analytical—training your brain to see beyond binary choices. Over time, bigger experiments feel more natural.
Do this with a friend, then hit reply and tell me:
- What did you learn?
- What felt different once you took action?
Because the truth is: Confidence doesn’t get you moving. Moving gives you confidence.
🔥 Ready to experiment on the bigger stuff?
Pick something you’re unsure about and design a small, low-stakes experiment. Click here for some thought-starter ideas for the big stuff and a framework for structuring experiments. No pressure. Just play. 🎈🐒
Forwarded this? Don't skip this step: sign up for new prompts every Friday:
Next week: How to tell the difference between intuition and fear.
To taking the next step,
Amy
P.S. If you’re feeling stuck on what your next experiment should be, let’s talk. [Book a free exploratory call here.]
Photo by Markus Spiske on Unsplash
